According to a quick Google (wowwiki), WoW has 9500 quests and I have 5 max-level characters and 4 more high-level. Obviously I haven't done all quests on all characters, but there are also a lot of daily quests that have been done repeatedly. So I'll low-ball it at, say 5500 quest per toon average. That's 50,000 quests in WoW alone, ignoring the characters on other servers and such. According to lotro.mmodb.com LotRO has 4433 quests, last updated in 2009. I had 9 max level toons at 10 levels past that. Lets call it 5000 apiece, another 45,000 quests.
That's 100,000 on two games.
The total number of quests I've played in all MMOs would be precisely: a metric shit-ton.
I've had quests I loved and quests I loathed. I've had quests that made me laugh and others that made we want to punch a puppy. I've had quests that made me want to bear the children of the designer and I've had quests that made me want to stare in their eyes as I choked the life from them.
But even with all the escort quests (for fuck's sake designers, all players HATE escort quests, so just stop!), there is one quest that towers above all the others as:
The Worst Quest Ever Designed
When I hit L40 back in WoW I could finally train riding...but I couldn't afford a mount. So I played 3 or 4 more levels, saving every copper, skipping out on training up skills I wasn't using so that I could finally buy my horse...and then it was great. You felt like you'd really accomplished something in the game. It was like passing a test...you'd gotten the level and the money and your mount...congratulations!
Ah...but it's not always so easy. For instance...
LotRO's quest to get the riding skill. <---the worst quest ever designed
In LotRO (at release, now things are a LOT friendlier because, well, you have to pay for every little thing) you had to get to level 35 before you could get riding. Not too bad, as in the old school MMOs they made you wait (and watch while all the cool kids rode by you) until you reached the appropriate level. But as in WoW, the level wasn't enough, you needed the money too. And in LotRO 4 gold and 220 silver (if memory serves) was an awful lot of cheese for a L35 to get.
So...you slowly work your way up to L35. You then grind out the really big chunk of cash. Finally! It's time! Off to Hengstacer Farms in the Bree Fields and you'll have riding at last!
Nope.
Hengstacer's got a quest for you...Fresh Steed for Bree. Ride a horse and drop it off at the stable in Bree in a generous amount of time. OK...not too bad. Before he'll let you BUY your horse (and give you the riding skill), do him a favor. Not huge deal. A couple minutes to ride to Bree, more than a couple to run back for your new horse!
Nope.
Hengstacer's got another quest for you...Fresh Steed for Michel Delving. Really? Uh...OK...I guess. That's a longer ride for sure. Across all of Bree Fields and the Shire. Annoying, but what choice do I have. Ride, ride (careful you don't hit any open water lest you get dismounted and have to start again!), ride, reach Michel Delving, in plenty of time, drop off the horse, catch a fast ride back to Bree, and run back for your new horse!
Nope.
Goddammit, give my horse!
Hengstacer's got another quest for you...Fresh Steed for Othrikar. This is ridiculous. I want to give you my money but you insist on making me do your scut work? Screw you, asshole. Oh...I don't have any choice if I want a mount and riding? Crap. Off to the North Downs I go. And I'd better be careful that I don't accidently hit the water and get dismounted. Oh...and the last half of the trip you're in an area where mobs will aggro you...and they can knock you off your mount so you get to redo "Fresh Steed For Othrikar", you lucky fellow!
You finally reach Othrikar (unless you're a friend of mine who confused it with Ost Guruth, rode off in entirely the wrong direction and timed out the quest and had to restart) and drop off the horse. You take a slow pony to Esteldin then a fast pony to Bree and run back to the Farm From Your Nightmares for your new horse!
Nope.
Fuck you Hengstacer. I hope your shitty little farm gets overrun by goblins you rat bastard.
Hengstacer has another quest for you...Proving Your Quality. Now it's time to complete the obstacle course that runs around the perimeter of your own personal hell, Hengstacer's Farm. Ride from gate to gate, hopping over obstacles, avoiding water, find the not-always-obvious next gate and as you near the finish line...you run out of time.
At this point you no longer want Hengstacer to die, you simply want to die yourself.
So after two or three more tries at the obstacle course, swearing and sweating, you barely make it in time over the finish line and can now, at last, buy your horse and get the riding skill!
Yep.
Wasn't that fun, exhilirating, and rewarding?
No, it was...The Worst Quest Ever Designed.
Let me explain further why it's the worst.
Getting a mount in many/most older MMOs is a signal moment, a transition that's obvious to all the other players. "That guy is x level". It's fairly subtle, but it's a big transition in ease of play, and frequently of the perception of the character/player, to themselves and others. Welcome to the big leagues kid!
It's something the players want to celebrate. In WoW I remember people "woo-hoo"ing in chats when they got their mount. It's like a mega-ding, a landmark, a Big Deal.
And LotRO turned what should be a moment of elation and empowerment into an extended act of frustration and punishment. I've heard guildies say something along the lines of "Ugh, level 35. Now I have to get my mount. What a pain in the ass," more often than not.
That's what makes it The Worst Quest Ever Designed. Because it turned a moment of celebration into one of disgust.
And I did that fucker 9 times.
-Lens
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